Family History

I've never been very good at family history, because in my family, most of the easy names are done. Now we have to find people and search records, and it's a long, grueling process that I have shied away from. But there's something about learning who my family is that intrigues me. I'm not necessarily trying to find out who my great-great-great-...... grandfather is, I just want to know who my grandmas and grandpas are.

Being the youngest of five with parents the youngest and middle child of five, I was on the low end of the kid line. Other than my Grandma Yule who just turned 95, all of my grandparents died when I was under the age of 10, and my Grandpa Oxnam died before I was born. I look at old pictures and I want to know the stories behind them.

One of the ones I most want to know about it my Grandma Rosella Oxnam who died when I was 3. This year, on July 28th, marks the 20th year of her being gone. She died one day before her 72nd birthday. I know people, especially in my family, don't believe me but I truly have very vivid memories of my grandma at that age. I wonder if it was the trauma of her death, or that I just have a great memory, but I remember things. I remember the tiny, steep staircase, I remember not being able to breath on the right side of her neck because she had had surgery, I remember getting hit in the eye by little blue berry-like things from what I think is a juniper tree at her house by my brother, and I remember singing at her funeral and seeing her in the casket. It's not big grand memories, just little snippets.

There are a few pictures, in particular, that I have seen and wish so much that I had known her.

Isn't she absolutely gorgeous? She must have been a model from the looks of the pictures. I remember I was looking at all of these pictures one day and I asked my mom what she was like. It was at the same time I was doing the pageant and she told me how much she would have loved watching me compete and how proud she would be of me. Just thinking about that now is enough to make me tear up wishing how I could have known her. I feel like we would have been very close. 

There is a necklace that my mom received after my grandma passed away that I have always loved. When I lived at home, it was probably the piece I borrowed most. I definitely wore it more than my mom, so when I left for college, she let me take it with me. I wear it all the time and get tons of compliments on it. I always let them know it was my grandma's. And every time my aunt sees me wearing it she comments on it. I love wearing something that reminds people of her. I can only assume that if we have the same taste in amazing jewelry, we probably had a lot of other things in common as well. 

As much as I would love to sit and talk with her and hear about her life, from her, I suppose I'll just have to ask everyone else what she was like and have a relationship with her through those stories. And if that's all I can have right now, I'll take it.